Dog Related Humor

(Humor - Canine Style! Note: "Other" Critters Allowed too!)

These various bits of humor have been sent to us by friends, clients & family members. They give us a chuckle & a smile [often when most needed], we hope they do the same for you!

One Dog - a poem, Author Unknown

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One Dog Is No Trouble And Two Are So Funny

The Third One Is Easy, The Fourth One A Honey

The Fifth Is Delightful, The Sixth One's A Breeze

You Find You Can Live With A Houseful With Ease

So How 'Bout Another? Would You Really Dare?

They're Really Quite Easy, But Oh Lord, The Hair!

With Dogs On The Sofa And Dogs On The Bed

And Crates In The Kitchen... No Bother, you said!

They're Really No Trouble, Their Manners Are Great

What's Just One More Dog And One More Little Crate?

The Sofa Is Hairy, The Windows Are Crusty

The Floor Is All Footprints, The Furniture's Dusty

The Housekeeping Suffers But What Do You Care?

Who Minds A Few Nose prints And A Little More Hair?

So Get a new Dog, You Can Always Find Room

And A Little More Time For The Dust Cloth And Broom

There's Hardly A Limit To The Dogs You Can Add

The Thought Of A Cutback Sure Makes You Feel Sad

Each One Is Special, So Useful, So Funny

The Food Bill Grows Larger, You Owe The Vet Money

Your Folks Never Visit, Few Friends Come To Stay

(Except Other Dog Folks Who Live The Same Way)

Your Lawn Has Now Died And The Shrubs Are Dead, Too

Your Weekends Are Busy, You're Off With Your Crew

There's Dog Food And Vitamins, Training And Shots

And Treats, Beds and Toys, Which Cost Lots and Lots

Is It Worth It, You Wonder? Are You Caught In A Trap?

Then That Favorite Comes Up And Climbs In Your Lap

His Look Says "You're Special", And You Know That You Will

Keep All of The Critters, In Spite Of The Bills

Winter's A Hassle, The Dogs Love It True,

They Must Have Their Walks, Tho' You're Numb And You're Blue.

Late Evening Is Awful, You Scream And You Shout

At Dogs On The Sofa Who Refuse To Go Out

The Dogs And The Kids, The Mess, And The Thrills

The Work And The Worry, The Pressure, The Bills

The Whole Thing Seems Worth It, The Dogs Are Your Life

They're Charming And Funny And Offset The Strife

Your Lifestyle Has Changed, Things Just Won't Be The Same

Yes Those Dogs Are Addictive And So's The Dog Game!

Dog Logic - Perhaps Humans Could Learn Great Lessons From Dogs!!

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The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail

instead of his tongue. -Anonymous

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My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can.

That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
-Joe Weinstein

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Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people,

who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love & hate.

-Anonymous

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If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise ..
-Unknown

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There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
-Ben Williams

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A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
-Josh Billings

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The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
-Andy Rooney

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Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
-Franklin P. Jones

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Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs

should relax and get used to the idea.
-Robert A. Heinlein

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If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you;

that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
-Mark Twain

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Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
-Roger Caras

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If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits

in your pocket and then give him only two of them.
-Phil Pastoret

Warning: Trampolines Can Be Very Dangerous!

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Oh Boy! That would leave a mark! - - I guess the Elks Lodge wouldn't share thier "Lodging" this day!

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